The dance of bonding and attachment of an adoptive child is a delicate and complicated process. Sure, you can take lessons and learn the basic moves, but the dance is different for every pair that steps onto the dance floor together.
Any parent with more than one child knows the vastness of differences in the children. Even so, it has been so interesting to watch how our two boys have differed in the way they have attached with us. Twins, yes. Unique individuals, definitely! Their personalities have factored in, and our personalities have factored in. Fear and trauma underline it all, but God. Only God can take the brokenness of adoption and make it whole. God continues to be faithful, and tonight, I wanted to praise His faithfulness. Our boys have been incredibly healthy since coming home. Nothing in their past would indicate strong, healthy boys, but God! Thank you, God, for giving them health! They had been home for over 6 months when their first sickness hit. First one, then the other. The first sick was eager for my love and attention. Being wrapped in my arms and doted over felt comfortable. But when his brother started feeling unwell, he put himself to bed. Turned out his lights, laid down, and covered up. I went to his side, and he told me, "When you are sick, you go to bed by yourself." I quickly responded, "Not in this house." And cuddled up right next to him. He continues to show signs that God is healing hurts and building trust. We continue to see tiny steps towards healthy attachment. Well, we are sick again. First one, then the other. Same order as before, but this time around, we have seen big changes. Today, we cuddled up on the couch. He wrapped both his arms around me and whispered, "You're the best mom in the world." God is doing big things in the heart of this little boy. Thank you, God, for healing his hurts. Our dance isn't over, but tonight, we made real progress toward getting into sync with each other. Thank you, God, for answering prayers.
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AuthorMy name is Deidra Miller. I have been married to my wonderful husband, Dusty, for 17 years. We have two biological children and our family is growing again. We prayed for 2,786 days and God answered our prayers. More days (almost 4 years) have been added as we wait for God's perfect plan for our family. We can't wait to meet our beautiful twin boys! Archives
October 2022
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